why real books are so hard to read

i just received my grades & comments back for 2 big research papers i wrote last semester. i am really really thankful for busy profs taking the time to write extensive feedback about specifics in my work.

SO, on these 2 big papers specifically the feedback was pretty similar.
the prof basically said the whole thing was awesome. i got a really good grade on both... not perfect but really good.
He wrote tons of specific comments and overall said that it was a "very engaging paper." That's cool, i thought... probably hard to engage a prof when he's reading 50 of these.
i think i actually affected my prof because of other specific comments he wrote.

Then he also wrote the only thing i got points docked for... and i quote:
"The writing style is great for blogging or inspirational writing, but not for graduate papers. Still, the content is excellent."
and again later:
"Good conversational writing, but not suited to seminary essays."

so, my writing style is effective & engaging BUT, not acceptable for grad school.

fair enough.
so, i gotta change the way i write to be more stuffy and hard to read. i need to not let the language naturally flow, but weigh it down in a more academic style.
i get it. that's what you want me to do. it's your school. your system, you make the rules.

but do you see why "real" books (and by "real" i mean books with a point) are so difficult to read?

because those authors probly went to graduate school somewhere & their professors made them change their writing style.

they had to write in a style that regular, average joe people don't readily and easily understand. they had to write in a style that only peeps within academia appreciate.

so, when you pick up a real book to read, the author probly writes fancy... smart... techinical... but not in a way that most humans would prefer to read.

so we either labor through those books...
or
we figure it's not worth it & just don't read it.

not that any of my profs or anyone running grad schools cares or that any of this is going to change.

unless someone wants me to be a president of a graduate school. :)


*but see, i want this stuff i'm working on to finish my master's degree & pouring mammoth amounts of hours into to be usable, profitable, beneficial to me.
to actually count for something.
and i don't mean a grade.

i don't want to have to fake fancy up a paper, just to have to go back later and translate it for myself!
maybe i'll just keep taking the deduction in points for my writing style.

there's writing... and then there's writing

i really love to write.

but as i've said before, i really love to write WHAT i want to write WHEN i want to write.

i have been cranking out research papers this semester at an insane pace. i enjoy it at the beginning, but because i don't have adequate time to put into it, i am hating it by the end of the paper.
sometimes i don't even feel like reading my own finished product.

i'm genuinely hoping this doesn't make me fall out of love with writing.

i need to write

i really really need to write for my own sake.

i come alive when i write. but when i'm not writing, it's as if i shrivel up inside.

when i'm learning and thinking about so much i HAVE to have an outlet and writing is one of those outlets for me. it helps me process and more practically understand and put in to practice the things i'm thinking, learning, and dreaming about.

but i haven't been very good at it lately. in fact, i've been really BAD at it lately. in December, i wrote LESS blogs i've ever written in any other month in the history of renown (4 years).

and in many ways, writing for me is definitely about QUANTITY over quality. that's a tension, but i really need to crank the stuff out of my head & not worry about how pretty, perfected, or excellent it is.

i haven't been doing this lately & the new year hasn't started off very well at all either.

but i'm laying down a goal and i'm making it public. 300 posts to renown in 2012. that's more than i've ever written. that's almost 1 article every single day. about 25 a month.

there, now i said it "out loud" for everyone to see. hopefully that helps keep me disciplined to reach my goal.

but the goal is only for the sake of me becoming a better me... developing what's inside of me & diving into this outlet that i desperately need.

another reason why i blog

yesterday i posted again about why i write/blog. you can read that HERE.

but i guess there's a secondary reason why i write too. here's an example:

i was at Catlayst 2011 last month. hung out with lots of old friends and met lots of new ones. at one break i was walking up the stairs from my seat and this guy jumped out into my path and was like:
"hey, is your name Patrick?"
"yeah."
"do you write a blog called renown?"
"yeah."
"man, your blog is so impacting. wow. I read it all the time. SO great to meet you." as he shakes my hand.

Richie and i got to talk for a while. he sounds like a phenomenal leader. campus pastor at a really big church up in Chicago. sounds like he killing it up there, but he's crazy humble and nice. i would be proud if Richie is representative of the normal demographic of renown readers.

and i can't even explain how humbling it is in that moment to hear that something you've written has impacted someone in such a positive way. crazy humbling and eggs me on a bit to keep writing.

so, shout out to Richie, btw! God bless in your new position, bro.

that's just 1 tiny example. since i started renown and have been writing for a few years now i've heard back from tons of readers whose lives have changed and the world is becoming a different place = children have been sponsored, people have reconciled with their families, their pastors, their churches, & people have told me their lives have been impacted in so many different ways.

this isn't the only reason i write, but really encouraging. all for 1 renown.

writing again...

i felt like i didn't write for a really long time. i guess technically i went about 2 weeks without writing here. but it felt like months and months. i felt like my soul was drying up when i wasn't writing. 
now that i've been writing again - i feel alive again. it's amazing how much i NEED to do this for my own good.

i have a few hundred partially written "articles" stacked up just waiting to pour out onto this blog. i've got to get them out of me and onto "paper". below is what i wrote HERE back on August 19 about WHY I WRITE.

tomorrow i'll actually post about another reason why i write.

______________________________________________
so why start a blog and write stuff pretty much every day?
great question & i'm glad you asked.

there are many answers to that question but the main reason is that I HAVE TO.

if i didn't write i think i would explode.

there just aren't enough people in the world to talk the things in my head out with. and i've gotta talk things out... or write things out.

writing is the way i have to process all these thoughts, ideas, wrestlings, learnings, etc... in my brain.

i've got to have an outlet for it all. renown is that outlet. i can write about whatever i want or need to write about on renown.

This helps me grow. it's part of my development. writing makes me a better me. writing helps me make sense of me, of God, of the world, of what's next, etc...

i know i'm not a great writer. i never claimed to be and have never really attempted to be. i just write. i just crank it out. get it out of my brain and down on paper. 

really, this blog is just for me. the fact that other people choose to read it is just an extra bonus i guess.

although ultimately, this blog is not for me. as the name implies, it's for a RENOWN bigger than mine. but not necessarily just that people read it and are pointed toward that renown. although it's awesome when that happens, it's secondary. Primarily, just the fact that i have a place to write helps me become who i think God is trying to mold me into for His renown.

so i don't think i'll ever stop writing. unless i stop having ideas and thoughts and wrestling with stuff. and i hope that's not until after i'm dead.

so i blog because... well, because i am. i think; therefore i blog.

i got this phrase from Tony Morgan but it's from my heart 100%. seriously. i blog because i think stuff. (& i'm no expert, but i'm guessing Tony somewhat adapted it from Descartes or someone like that in the age of Reason or Rationalism or the Enlightenment ?)

"I process what I believe and figure out who I am while I write. I think; therefore I blog." - Tony Morgan

What is YOUR outlet or avenue for processing all that stuff in YOUR brain?

...on writing

I love to write.

But, let me be clear, I like to write when I like to write.

The trouble is, that if you want to be a writer, you have to write when you don’t feel like writing or else you don’t get to write when you do feel like writing.

(because if you're inconsistent, you don’t have a platform left to stand on for peeps to read when you want to write. *not that i necessarily want to be a writer by any stretch of the imagination.)

so, here's to this practice & discipline of writing when i love to write & writing even when i don't feel like it.

superhero

sometimes i like to just sit and watch the world... watch life happen... and write about it as i see it. it's just a good thing for me to do sometimes.

i like to simply watch and then process what i'm seeing by writing about it.

i rarely ever put that stuff anywhere else besides my "thoughts" file. but i was cleaning op some "thoughts" recently and one of those random musings caused me to think more about becoming a parent soon. so i thought i would thought i would post it here to renown.

The following is what i wrote the week of this past Christmas (2010). i was in New York with my wife's family and i stole away to a Starbucks inside a Target for a little while. here is what i saw and wrote:

I'm watching a mom walk into Target…

in the snow.

Deep snow.

With 5 kids.

5 kids.

Tugging 4 across the street all holding hands & carrying one in a carrying car seat thing.

Until one of the littlest walking boys dropped his zip lock bag of gold fish & had to run back and get it. Then the chain was broken only for a few moments.

This mom looks really tired. 

It's really cold outside and I have been being a baby about how cold NY is in December.

i've had a revelation sitting here drinking my coffee and watching this scene. maybe one day i'll find out if this "hunch" of mine is actually true:

When you go to the store with 5 kids – you don’t have a good day.

Another mom is sitting beside me sipping her Starbucks with her 6ish year old. She just said to him in a very admirable tone – “wow. 5 kids. She must be a superhero!” 

haha - her little boy just said “she must have been like this big around (motioning with his hands) when she had all of them!” 

mom said “well, they’re not all the same age. [as if that explained it enough] She must be a superhero though.”

And superhero she is indeed.

that time thought by me also in a very admirable tone.

Then a guy with a hard core mullet and a huge bald eagle on the back of his jacket walked by. 

wow. 

couldn't get my camera open on my phone fast enough though. the sight sufficiently disrupted my thoughts about the world at this moment.

i think; therefore i blog

so why start a blog and write stuff pretty much every day?
great question & i'm glad you asked.

there are many answers to that question but the main reason is that I HAVE TO.

if i didn't write i think i would explode.

there just aren't enough people in the world to talk the things in my head out with. and i've gotta talk things out... or write things out.

writing is the way i have to process all these thoughts, ideas, wrestlings, learnings, etc... in my brain.

i've got to have an outlet for it all. renown is that outlet. i can write about whatever i want or need to write about on renown.

This helps me grow. it's part of my development. writing makes me a better me. writing helps me make sense of me, of God, of the world, of what's next, etc...

i know i'm not a great writer. i never claimed to be and have never really attempted to be. i just write. i just crank it out. get it out of my brain and down on paper. 

really, this blog is just for me. the fact that other people choose to read it is just an extra bonus i guess.

although ultimately, this blog is not for me. as the name implies, it's for a RENOWN bigger than mine. but not necessarily just that people read it and are pointed toward that renown. although it's awesome when that happens, it's secondary. Primarily, just the fact that i have a place to write helps me become who i think God is trying to mold me into for His renown.

so i don't think i'll ever stop writing. unless i stop having ideas and thoughts and wrestling with stuff. and i hope that's not until after i'm dead.

so i blog because... well, because i am. i think; therefore i blog.

i got this phrase from Tony Morgan but it's from my heart 100%. seriously. i blog because i think stuff. (& i'm no expert, but i'm guessing Tony somewhat adapted it from Descartes or someone like that in the age of Reason or Rationalism or the Enlightenment ?)

"I process what I believe and figure out who I am while I write. I think; therefore I blog." - Tony Morgan

What is YOUR outlet or avenue for processing all that stuff in YOUR brain?

long time no blog

i think this officially the longest i have ever gone without blogging.

This year i've been posting something almost every day, but my last post was June 13... 10 days between posts is a new record for renown.

i guess i was too busy to write and other things took priority over blogging in the last 11 days.

i'm thankful that Ridge was able to team up with a couple other churches and we pulled off our own camp this week at Myrtle Beach for Middle and High Schoolers. it was an awesome week.

just to clarify, i haven't given up on writing. just the opposite. i guess i took a little accidental sabbath from blogging.
now i'm coming back refreshed and hopefully better. because i have a lot of things i want to write about. a lot of things i'm passionate about saying.

i'm excited to start saying them tomorrow